Since news of my Mom’s cancer diagnosis, I have been a mess. Not on the outside so much. I have had a few breakdowns while the kids were at school and the babies were napping.
I have every emotion under the sun fighting inside my head.
Her surgery has been rescheduled for Monday, and they will be removing the entire thyroid. I know she will be in the hospital at least overnight, possibly longer.
I want to be optimistic, its my nature. No sense in worrying, always look on the bright side, glass half full, yada yada yada. But this is my mom, so the tiny voice of doubt is much bigger and stronger.
Between the worrying, Mother Nature has been bringing me several smiles. Yesterday morning, there were so many butterflies flying around me and the kids as we went to the bus stop we couldn’t help but giggle with delight. They seemed to come from nowhere and they kept landing on and around us, staying around much longer than usual for us to admire their beauty.
Our seeds we planted just a few short days ago are very quickly sprouting.
That big, tall over achiever there is a cucumber plant. I am really looking forward to canning some home made pickles later this season! Our pumpkins and butternut squash are also sprouting and will all need to be transplanted soon.
This gorgeous little guy is an Indigo Bunting. He came to the bird feeder after an especially bad break down yesterday, and graciously lingered long enough for me to snap a few pictures of him. What a beauty!
I am finding joy when and where I can. Bella has her last dance competition of the season this weekend. She is so excited, I can’t wait to see her on stage again. We have birthday parties and recitals and so many things to look forward to in the coming weeks. Maybe even a wedding!
I predict that this weekend will be rough. Monday will be torturous. But once the surgery is over, once my mom is home safe and sound, recovering and healing, I will be able to once again take a deep breath and all will be well.
Thank you for the thoughts, prayers and well wishes. Excuse me for being a recluse. I am very appreciative.